When four classmates from a small Massachusetts college move to New York to make their way, they're broke, adrift, and buoyed only by their friendship and ambition. There is kind, handsome Willem, an aspiring actor; JB, a quick-witted, sometimes cruel Brooklyn-born painter seeking entry to the art world; Malcolm, a frustrated architect at a prominent firm; and withdrawn, brilliant, enigmatic Jude, who serves as their center of gravity.

Over the decades, their relationships deepen and darken, tinged by addiction, success, and pride. Yet their greatest challenge, each comes to realize, is Jude himself, by midlife a terrifyingly talented litigator yet an increasingly broken man, his mind and body scarred by an unspeakable childhood, and haunted by what he fears is a degree of trauma that he’ll not only be unable to overcome—but that will define his life forever.

was it necessary to have so much trauma and sexual abuse in a book? i never really understood the importance of that much darkness throughout the novel – did it help get the main idea across? what even was the main idea?

jude's childhood was also wildly graphic. too much so. i would've like to read more about jb and malcolm because i think they had equally as interesting lives.

i also heard through the rumor mill that yanagihara never did research for this book which...yikes.

that being said, this is the first book to make me cry in a while.